Nigerian dance legend and fitness coach Kaffy (Kafayat Oluwatoyin Shafau) has bravely spoken out about the emotional hurdles she faces in the dating world as a single mother of two. On the Honest Bunch podcast, she recounted the painful moment a man bluntly dismissed her for having children. That rejection has stayed with the 45-year-old, igniting a broader conversation on cultural biases and outdated thinking. 

With unfiltered honesty, Kaffy challenged the notion that divorced individuals or single parents are less viable marriage partners. She asked a poignant question that hits at the heart of societal hypocrisy: “What makes you think a woman who has been divorced is not even the better candidate if she has worked on herself?”

Kaffy further highlighted the irony behind longing for a "fresh" partner, yet overlooking the reality that over 70% of marriages collapse regardless. “Why are people insisting on marrying someone fresh,” she pressed, “when both of you are heading into the same statistical risk?”

Beyond the dating setbacks, she also took a stab at romantic clichés, such as butterflies representing love. “A lot of butterflies in the tummy is a trauma response,” she noted. “Real love brings peace, not butterflies.”

Kaffy’s frankness extends into how she navigates relationships post-divorce. Married in 2015 and divorced in early 2022, she reflected on the importance of emotional healing and self-awareness, not just in choosing a partner, but in maintaining one.

Her message resonates widely: true readiness for love shouldn’t be judged by one’s past, but by the growth and strength they bring into new chapters. Kaffy urges her audience to rethink assumptions, dismiss stigma, and recognize that readiness and resilience often come from those who have “been through it,” not despite it.